authoritative clown - I don't think they meant me.
truck monkey throw a guy off bridge - That one, maybe.
chinese sit-n-spin sex chair - Don't worry. I Googled it for you, and I don't think it exists.
dolphin poems - Bet they were pissed.
my boyfriend is afraid to express his feelings - I hope I helped.
who's gonna win Xavier or Georgia? - That person I know I helped.
jockstrap central - I got nothing for this one. Feel free to fill in your own.
hayden christensen - Six people using Google Blog Search have landed here looking for this schmuck since I mentioned him in passing earlier this week. I wonder how many would show up for Brad Pitt?
i am leaving college and want a caption for underneath my photograph – any ideas - I'm guessing this person was writing an email, then looked up and saw the screen was still on Google and said, "Fuck it. I'll try it anyway."
poem of a killer whale - I didn't know there was such a demand for cetacean poetry. Perhaps I shall write some.
Honestly, that’s all this post was gonna be. I wasn’t feeling particularly ambitious last night, in fact, what I was feeling like was Oreos. So when I finished, I walked to the kitchen, flipped on the light, and instead of Oreos I found a half-dead cockroach in the middle of the floor. We're not slobs, I swear, and almost never do we find roaches inside the house. But